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What Is Narcissistic Personality Disorder?

The Dr. Phil Podcast

1.1M views 5 years ago

Warm-up Questions

When you hear the phrase “personality disorder,” what do you think it means?
What behaviors might make someone seem like they always want to be the “center of attention”?
Why do you think it can be hard to have a close relationship with someone who lacks empathy?

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What Is Narcissistic Personality Disorder?

Attention, admiration, and lack of empathy (00:00 – 02:09)

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1. How does the speaker describe the narcissist’s need for attention?

They only want attention from close friends
They need to be the center of attention and see others’ attention as a threat
They prefer attention sometimes, but usually avoid it
They don’t notice when others get attention

2. In the example about someone arriving late to work, what is described as a typical (non-narcissistic) reaction?

“You’ll have to get another one.”
“You’re here now, so let’s get to work.”
“Oh my gosh, you must feel terrible. I’m so sorry.”
“What kind of dog was it?”

3. According to the speaker, what does it mean to be empathetic (as described here)?

To feel happy when someone else is happy
To identify with another person’s feelings by putting yourself in their position
To agree with everything someone says
To give advice immediately when someone has a problem

What Is Narcissistic Personality Disorder?

Traits and patterns: entitlement, arrogance, envy, and long-term behavior (02:09 – 04:24)

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1. What does the speaker say narcissists often don’t do in social situations?

They don’t read the room
They don’t talk at all
They don’t remember people’s names
They don’t make eye contact

2. What does the speaker say is required to “get along” with these kinds of people?

You must compliment them only once a week
You must always debate them to prove your point
You must constantly subordinate your interests and needs to theirs
You must avoid them completely

3. How does the speaker distinguish narcissistic personality disorder from being a “show-off” sometimes?

It happens only at work
It is a consistent pattern of behavior across time
It is caused only by one bad day
It happens only in romantic relationships

What Is Narcissistic Personality Disorder?

Gaslighting, confrontation, and therapy outcomes (04:24 – 07:33)

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1. What does the speaker advise people to do about “calling out” or confronting a narcissist?

Don’t bother
Do it only through text messages
Do it only in public
Do it often until they apologize

2. Which statement is presented as an example of gaslighting in the transcript?

“Let’s talk about what I did wrong.”
“I understand why you feel that way.”
“I need some time to think.”
“You’re the narcissist. I never said that.”

3. Why does the speaker say therapy can make some narcissists worse?

Because therapy makes them forget their past
Because therapy teaches them how to mimic empathy and hide narcissism better
Because therapy always increases anger in everyone
Because therapists refuse to talk about emotions

What Is Narcissistic Personality Disorder?

Transcript will load here…

1. Which idea is emphasized as central to narcissistic personality disorder in this talk?

A consistent long-term pattern including entitlement and lack of empathy
A fear of speaking in public
Occasional confidence and pride
A preference for working alone

2. In the speaker’s explanation, what is one major reason close relationships are difficult for narcissists?

They dislike all hobbies
They avoid making plans
They travel too much
They don’t have the ability to be empathetic

3. What risk does the speaker suggest can happen if someone tries to confront a narcissist directly?

The narcissist will become more empathetic permanently
The narcissist will quietly leave and never speak again
The narcissist may gaslight and turn the situation around to blame the other person
The narcissist will immediately admit everything

Discussion Questions

Discuss the ideas from this video

What Is Narcissistic Personality Disorder?

What is the difference between being sympathetic and being empathetic? Give a real-life example.
Do you agree that confronting someone who gaslights you is usually unhelpful? Why or why not?
What does it mean to “read the room,” and why might it matter in relationships or at work?
If someone shows narcissistic traits sometimes, how could you tell whether it is a “pattern of behavior across time”?